Day 339: Rushing
The future is currently hurtling towards me at a frightening speed and I can barely keep up.
I’m taking my SATs this Saturday.
I haven’t studied. At all.
I am mega terrified. I’ve taken the practice tests and I’ve brushed up on my vocabulary and I’ve (more-or-less) gone through some maths formulas and I have no idea what I’m doing. I scored pretty well on the practice questions and things but I just feel like this is a major deal and I am half-assing my entire life and I don’t know what to do.
Realistically speaking, I’m not actually going to any colleges abroad. But I need to know if I can do this. But with the amount of work I’ve gotten to put into this whole thing, I’ll be surprised to make it out alive.
Day 338: Mind-Blowing
My English teacher is a literal godsend.
We’re discussing Les Miserables in class, and if I’m being honest, from the first time I read the book— well, from the first time I heard the story— I never really liked Marius. He was always just this flat, boring, head-over-heels-stupid boy to me. I didn’t see the point in making him a major character, considering he can be so… passion-less and flimsy as compared to, say, Enjolras or any of the Friends of the ABC. Basically, I didn’t like him.
Today, we were discussing Marius. I was bracing myself for some boring discussion on his love for Cosette and how they were the romantic ideals of the time or something, but instead, I sat through what was literally the most mind-blowing academic experience of my high school life.
I have spent years hating this character, and now I completely understand his depth and purpose in the story. I know what his point is as an individual and what he stands for in society. I like Marius now. I’m rooting for him. After years of tolerating him and his seemingly-far-fetched life and strange brand of stupidity. I like Marius.
English class never fails to show me how unimaginably wrong I am about literature. And I am never so happy to be proven wrong than in English class.
Day 337: Groups
Group projects were invented by satan.
I literally just want to crawl in a hole and die.
Sometimes life sucks and people help you through it. Sometimes life sucks and people suck even more. Today is an example of the latter.
Day 336: Time
Who’s willing to bet I’ll be posting this on either Thursday or Saturday?
I’m swamped. Even when there’s not much to do, I’m swamped. It’s sad and confusing and altogether just really sucks. This blog— all my blogs, actually— have been mega neglected and I just can’t seem to have time for the important things anymore because though I actually have time I am tired beyond belief.
This doesn’t look like it’ll be letting up until at least the new year. Ugh.
Day 335: Fam
Family time is under-appreciated.
There’s no occasion, but my dad (at my sister’s prompting) decided to take all of us to a Japanese buffet for dinner. It’s been a while since we were all complete, so he figured, why not?
Deliciousness of the food aside, it was great to just chill out with everyone, y’know? We’ve all been so busy and so stressed out about our own lives that it was just nice to drop it all and grill some beef.
Day 334: Let It Go
(Not a) Review - Frozen
I am not going to pretend like this is a review because really, it’s basically just me gushing.
- Frozen is basically what happens when Hollywood takes a step back and says, ‘Okay. We should not be singing this stuff. Get some Broadway stars.’ Honestly some of the best music I have heard from Disney in a very long time.
- The story is pretty simple, but whoever said that was a bad thing?
- The animation is gorgeous and there’s really no other word for it. The intricacies in the snow? Ugh, beautiful.
- I’m loving the movies Disney’s been shelling out recently. I feel like I’m being brought back to my childhood.
- Olaf the snowman might be my favorite character ever.
- Also am I the only one who’s seeing some sort of parallel with Elsa and Elphie? [semi-spoiler alert] ‘Alone and free’, anybody?
- Mostly I am just insanely proud that four of the five main characters are Broadway supers. Idina, Josh, Jon, Santino… ugh. <3
- Idina Menzel, your voice is literally heaven.
- Kristen sounds absolutely fantastic as well!! :—-)
- When the credits came out, the guy in front of me went, “Idina Menzel?! Well that’s why the queen sounds fantastic— it’s Idina Menzel!!!” I resisted the urge to hug him and scream “I know!!!”
Basically I loved the movie. And, as with most Disney animations, it automatically gets a special place in my Favorite Things Ever list.
Day 333: #SSS
#SetSailSeniors? Nope, super sentimental senioritis.
I’ve been spending a lot of time with my kiddos from the newspaper lately. In addition to that, I’ve been getting approached by a lot of juniors about the Oxbridge programs. And coupled with the fact that a lot of us have been taking note of our ‘lasts’, it’s been fairly emotional.
The seniors have this whole #SetSail thing going on, and it’s pretty self-explanatory so I’m not gonna dive into that, but I will say this: I well and truly am ready to see what lies beyond the horizon. But I’m also— and this might be the worst timing ever— starting to get attached to the harbor. It’s like I’m finally starting to understand why people say it’s so difficult to leave.
I’ve still got a little over three months to enjoy life on the pier. Here’s to making the most out of it.
Oy this is really cheesy. I kind of need to stop that.
Day 332: I Am Not
I am a lot of things.
I can be mean, I can be a little rude and douchebaggy. I can be nice, I can be incredibly kind-hearted and understanding. I can be weak, I can be one hell of a pushover and way too feeble. I can be strong, I can be very assertive and will take no nonsense from anyone.
I can be, and I am, a lot of things. But there is one thing that I have never been, and as far as I can help it, will never be. One thing that I don’t think I can ever have it in me to be.
I am a lot of things. But I am not a bully.
Day 331: Ridiculous…ly Adorable?
For our Health project, we (groups) are supposed to assume the roles of marriage counselors and design a blog for newlyweds and married couples. It sounds a little ridiculous, but that’s beside the point.
Now, my group and I were talking, and we decided that if we were to be ‘credible marriage counselors’, then we’d have to be… well, married. So now I’m working on biodatas for each one of us, basically narrating our future lives.
It’s ridiculous but it’s also pretty adorable. We basically made our future lives the lives we’ve always wanted, plus a fiance or husband (two of four of us actually don’t want to get married oop). And I sound ridiculous— I really do, considering I’m talking about meeting the love of my life at a writing workshop at NYU and living in Chelsea— but I don’t know, it’s all pretty adorable.
General idea of what my other groupmates’ future lives are like:
- One meets the love of her life in the dessert aisle of a Paris grocery store.
- One marries her college sweetheart, who met her at an on-campus cafe.
- One is engaged to an upperclassman in her university which she met in drama club.
We’re all a little insane.
Day 330: Passing the Torch
I gave a talk to the juniors about Oxbridge and the New York College Experience.
I gave it with my friend Stef, who offered the other perspective of I-didn’t-go-but-I-could’ve (long story). We only talked for about ten minutes, but it was definitely enough that I felt the excitement after we finished. Right now I know for certain that at least ten people are interested in going for it.
I don’t know a lot of the juniors. Truth be told, I’ve never talked to most of them. But I am so excited for any of them who get to have the same opportunity. Oxbridge was literally the best thing to ever have happened to me, and is something I will love and remember from the rest of my life.
Now I get to pass the torch.